Wednesday, September 15, 2010

the Playground

You know, it's funny all the drama that pops up on the playground at such a young age. It reminds me of highschool and the little cliques who won't include other people. I just can't believe my 4 year old daughter is so big. It seems like yesterday that we were going to the park just so she could go in the baby swings. Now, I tell her to go "play with the kids." But it always amazes me that she can't always just "go play with the kids." She will sometimes come back and say, "they said I can't play with them." Or I will watch her from a distance and watch her try to play with some girls her age, and watch them snubbing her, whispering in each other's ears, and purposely leaving her out. And poor Maddy doesn't realize what they are doing. She is just trying so hard just to play and have fun with them. I think to myself, "are we 14 or 4?" Immediately my motherly defenses kick in and I want to go tell off these little 4 year old snobs, but then I realize that my reactions are teaching my daughter how to react to situations like these. I haven't always handled them the best way possible, but I hope to teach Maddy how to deal with these small situations, as they are just the beginning of dealing with difficult people, hard situations, and the world. It's hard to see her have to face rejection and bullies at the playground, but then again, it's a good lesson. I've seen her treat other kids harshly, be the one who won't share, and get mad at others who are playing on something she wants to play on. It's a good time to teach "the golden rule" and to remind her how it feels to be treated wrongly.
But still, I can't emphasize enough how shocked I am especially of the drama between little girls. It seems to start early, and I would almost rather that Maddy play with boys because of the lack of drama. They just seem to play. But of course Maddy would rather play with the girls at the playground who are in a little group, playing with their expensive dolls and expensive strollers, and running around together. But all too often, they are content to just play with each other and not let another little girl "in."
So a lesson to Maddy and myself. Check the emotions. Learn to positively deal with difficult people. Remove yourself from mean people who can't play nice, and always be ready and willing to include others in your group of friends. Don't harbor anger or bitterness towards people, let it slide right off and find other people to be around. Watch your tongue. Be a light.
It's a tough world out there, but I am finding that every situation is a teaching/learning situation for my daughter. If I respond negatively, she will respond negatively, and will continue to do so in the future. She is watching me and learning how to deal with her own little emotions. O Lord, give me wisdom, and help me to bite my tongue!!

"He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin."
Proverbs 13:3

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